Big Decisions

There are so many big decisions as motherhood is on the horizon. The nursery wall color, which glider to purchase, disposable diapers vs cloth, and the enormous question: to work or not to work? This question has been on my mind (a bit far back there) for years. Growing up, I responded to the "What do you want to be when you grow up?" question alternatively with "a teacher" and "a mom", and by mom, I meant a stay at home mom. It was what I knew, and what I respected, and what I wanted. And then, I grew up, and I started my career. I taught long hours, I built up my resume, I completed my masters degree...all so I could be a better, more well established, and more successful teacher, and career woman. I started to scoff a bit at those stay at home moms, while internally battling with my future decision. What would I do, now, knowing and doing what I do now? What would my co-workers think of me? What would my stay at home friends think of me? What do I want and how do I feel about this momentous decision?

And here we are. At the crossroads, and a necessary decision needed. Through God's great plan, and some maneuvering and begging on my part, and the delicate and momentary good mood of the Human Resources department, I am undertaking neither path. I won't work or stay at home full time, and so it is funny to realize the decision I vacillated between for so long isn't even what I am choosing.

But God's plan--although sometimes hard to understand and definitely difficult to wait upon--is good. I am embarking on a new journey, one as a part time teacher and part time stay at home mom. I am thrilled, and sad, and excited, and scared. We realized I do in fact need to work, and so the full time stay at home option wasn't in fact an option at all. But, I couldn't bring myself to abandon that long term dream. And so we are here. I am feeling very good about the change, but it is hard to know what the future will be like, so naturally I have fears at well. Will I like it? Can I handle it? Will I miss my baby? Will I miss my job? I know I'll cry the first day back and be stressed about breastfeeding at work, but I know I'll enjoy adult interaction and the feeling of doing something to benefit others.

This article encouraged my spirit today and made me feel as though I am making the best decision for our family. I'm so thankful for this part time opportunity.

What If the Best Years of Your Life...Just Aren't?

2nd Trimester

I'm so thankful to be finishing my 2nd Trimester! Baby Ganz is growing big and strong, and he is very healthy! We could not be more thrilled and I can't wait to be sharing my 3rd Trimester collages!

Here's my chalkboard tracker collage from the 2nd trimester:

And my photo collage from the 2nd Trimester:

Baby bump is growing, that is for sure!

Perks

Tom gets very few perks in his 80 hour a week residency, but this weekend we got to enjoy one! After our nursing class, we headed up to Labor and Delivery and Tom gave me an ultrasound! It was so fun to see our little guy moving around and measure his growth. I felt a bit like Rachel from FRIENDS here, though.

Tom is so talented at doing and reading ultrasounds, I'm so proud of him. But, as he was all "oh, look, the baby's resting his head on his hands," I was all, "What?! Where!? I don't see it....there?! huh?"  So, after Tom readjusting the entire machine so he could simultaneously move the ultrasound probe AND point out the baby on the screen, I was able to understand [i think] all the movements of our little cutie. In my defense, as the baby gets bigger, you only see one small portion/body part at a time so it is hard to piece it all together.  It was easy back when baby was small, but now he is over 2 pounds!!

It really didn't matter, though, because seeing his movements and heartbeats were all I needed to make me thankful and overjoyed!

It's a...

I was one of those people who totally mocked the idea of a gender reveal party. I mean, come on, now you have to attend a party to find out the baby’s gender?! SO cheesy. It probably didn't help that I felt like everyone around me was having babies and it wasn't happening for me.

So, fast forward, and here we are: 20 week ultrasound ahead and what do I insist on having? Why, a gender reveal party, of course!

I am so glad that we went through with the party, though, as it was the highlight of our pregnancy so far.  I wanted to enjoy the fun and creative details, and of course, I had a grand vision. I tried to keep it simple, but I did create ties and tutu clips with my brand new Silhouette Cameo (thank you Tom!) for everyone to wear based on their guess. I bought some poufs off Amazon that I fluffed up, and we had a casual and fun BBQ one Saturday in April to announce the big news. Tom and I found out ahead of time, as it is pretty easy for OBGYNs to read ultrasounds. It was actually very special for us to find out together and have those moments together, then share that with family.

I really wanted to do something creative, and I had seen on a blog—but never heard of anyone doing it in real life—a question mark piñata filled with pink or blue confetti. Being who I am, I thought, I can make that! :) Well, about two weeks beforehand, I realized I had NO time to be making my own piñata, and had a bit of a meltdown. Thankfully I have the best parents in the world who said they would attempt it. And it turned out great! They created the shell and I spray painted and decorated it. I thought, wouldn’t it be cute to do little poufs of tissue all over? And 7 hours later, it was done {how do I always do that to myself!?}!

It was such a joy to have our closest friends and family around us as we announced our little one’s gender. And, we have it all on video, too! We are so thankful to be at this point and overjoyed about our bundle of…

BOY!!

Summer Reading List

One of my favorite things about summer is enjoying reading a good book by the pool...or better yet, the beach! I love soaking up the sun while checking out a new read.  Unfortunately, it seems there is never enough time in the summer to read, and now I keep thinking, this is my LAST free summer for reading with baby arriving this fall. Don't get me wrong, I'm thrilled about baby Ganz, but I'm just being realistic. The days of lounging by the pool without interruptions are probably near long gone! :)

So, here's my incredibly long list, and is probably beyond my ability to actually get done [what with tutoring and prepping for baby]:

For EDUCATION:
Reading in the Wild: The Book Whisperer's Keys to Cultivating Lifelong Reading Habits

For FUN:
The Hunger Games
Catching Fire
Mockingjay

For BABY:
Hypnobirthing: The Mongan Method
The Happiest Baby on the Block
On Becoming Babywise
What to Expect the First Year